January 2007
→ Lag
(31st January 2007)
I thought jet lag had passed me by, after two days of normal bedtimes and normal up-times. Until today. Wide awake at 4am. Doing the shopping at Tesco's at 7am. At the chemist's for an antidote to Immodium at 9am. And now I'm knackered. The last time I was in Tesco's at an ungodly hour, there was a policeman standing in ...
→ Crime
(29th January 2007)
Date: 28 January 2007
Time: 20.30
Location: Immigration (UK Passports), Terminal 3, Heathrow Airport
Crime: Attempting to enter one's own country
Report for submission:
Subject, half-dead from exhaustion, valium and Immodium, hands passport to immigration official.
Immigration official swipes the passport. Immigration official looks puzzled. Immigration official swipes passport again.
Immigration official to half-dead British subject - Has your passport got wet, madam?
Subject - I don't know.
Immigration official - ...
→ Karma
(28th January 2007)
What does one do on one's last day of a two and a half month trip to wonderful places, all of which was accomplished in pretty much perfect health? One gets the runs.
I blame Sonu. The adorable smiley-faced Sonu who is the cook at the beach camp I was staying in. He took a shine to me. We played beachball. Then he served me dodgy ...
→ Consett
(25th January 2007)
An example of the kind of conversation that can be heard over breakfast in a beachside cafe. Cast: One Cockney couple. One Geordie couple. One eavesdropping Yorkshirewoman trying to read John Le Carre. Cockney man: Do you know what time it is?Geordie couple (man), in Geordie accent: 11.30Cockney man: Are you from Newcastle?Geordie couple: Aye not far. ...